Best. Interview. Ever.
Obscure 18th Century American Political Journalist, Cato, the Honest Farmer, interviews Cindy Sheehan.Q: Madame Fheehan, what if your confidered judgment of that iffue judged to be of paramount import to dogmatic philofophef af much af our learned clerify – the ever increasing encroachment of the LEVIATHAN?
A: Um… I’m sorry, I don’t understand. And you confused your “f’s” with “s’s.”
Q: Forry. Prithee, sorry. The question concerns the subversion of the antitent state of our country, making a revolution of sovereignty which, prima fonte, by declaration of the tyranny of reason, threatens our oeconomy, constitution, and commonweal, perhaps leading to an agrarian revolt and return to a state of nature, viz Shay’s Rebellion.
A: Yeah, I still don’t get it. Also, none of that was a question.
Q: Moving on. I understand thou hast recently entangled thyself with issues concerning WAR in the land of Mohammedan. But, as the learned Thomas Hutchinson hath noted, what of the possible connexion between this race and the mystic Hindoo?
A: My main point is that this war –
Q: As the eminent Thomas Jefferson has observed “It should be our endeavour to cultivate the peace and friendship of every nation, even of that which has injured us most, when we shall have carried our point against her.”
A: I think his point even makes sense for today. But I also –
Q: And yet, how can we avoid such crossing of the lances, when we continue to maintain entangling alliances, along with the Scylla of a standing army, and the Charybdis of a foolish and wicked naval fleet? Has the dread torment of the Barbary pirates failed to educate us on this point?
A: I think I should go.
Q: But not until our most important point has been difcuffed. How has your individual education sharpened the senses, formed the temper, and regulated the passion so as to overcome the intoxicating regal homage that make of the majority of women no more than a common aristocrat? Is it, as the learned doctors of medicine declaim, a distemper of the humors? Do you have an excess of the spleen?
A: Bush is a terrorist.
posted by Tim @ 4:42 PM
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